Burst Posting

Have you ever wanted to post like ten posts in one day? Do you ever get the insane feeling of must write more… Only to end up feeling like a zombie that can’t see straight?

If you have then you know how I feel right now.

I’m a burst  blogger. I write ten million things one day and then nothing for like a month. Then I realize I haven’t written anything so I post another ten million posts and so the cycle goes. I am so tired of not being able to write consistently. I want to be an at home writer or go to work and be an editor. I’m tired of making next to nothing and yes, I think I’m feeling a bit peeved because I went to college and and everything. I mean I totally deserve a shiny office with lots of bobbly things. I deserve to make enough money to pay my bills and keep my horses.

Oh, how I hate the tough times. It’s my fault really, I prayed for strength and that is what I’ve learned. I’ve learned to be strong and to fight for what I want. But, at what cost; at what reality. What did I miss by pushing forward with these dreams? Did I miss love? Did I miss that part of my path? Am I going to be single forever? My friends are all growing up and doing adult things like get married and have kids and buy houses and have careers. Where I’m still that girl with a dream riddled brain. I still dream of making it big- of getting that chance of being a success. However, as each day limps along I realize that I need to get out of that dream mode. Which might be difficult since I have narcolepsy and I am always dreaming (at least on some level).

I think one of the kickers was when my doctor assumed I was a Mrs.- that is what she put on my paperwork for my work (reasonable accommodations paperwork) and I told my boss “She put Mrs. Fountain but I’m not married” because that little modifier to my name was a big deal. I felt a little embarrassed that I was still single but being single is all I’ve ever known. Now, I’m not sure how this post diverged onto this topic but I guess it relates. I write bursts of posts based on various topics that zip around my mind. Usually, those thoughts all converge on my consciousness at once so that I am stuck writing about all of them all at once or not at all.

This year, I’m going to be a bit wiser and I’m going to schedule these posts out so that I don’t inundate everyone’s feed with like four posts in one day.

Happy New Year everyone!

Advertisements

NaNoWriMo

I am a few days late. Uh, six days to be exact. However, I’d like to say that I have a valid excuse. My car got totalled last week. A guy hit me with his utility trailer. I said it that way because whenever I say I was in an accident everyone assumes I was at fault (I wasn’t).

Thankfully my physical injuries are relatively minor. I injured my lower back and I have headaches but no broken bones nor any facial damage. The emotional and financial repercussions of the accident are substantial. Direct and indirect costs due to the crash have reached about ten grand and will increase as I have to go to the chiropractors and physical therapy. I guess I’ve hit a spate of bad luck.

So, I’ve not had the energy to write much. In fact I think I hit a large writer’s block. I said I would do NaNoWriMo though and so I shall. I’m writing it on Tablo- a book writing site. I like it because it is very user friendly and I love the interface. It is very intuitive and I would recommend it to any and all of my writer friends.

Here is a link to the beginning of my NaNoWriMo novel keep in touch and check back often. I have about another 100 words to write tonight and then I’ll call it quits.

My goal is to hit 50000 words this month. At the moment that means I need to write about 2084 words per day. I’m shooting for about 2500 words a day but we’ll see what happens. The most important thing is consistency. Writing is all about consistency.

Watching Castle Yields Results

I’m catching up on last night’s episode of Castle. He just said “Every fantasy story is based on a kernel of truth. An experience that powerful is going to find its way onto the page.”

Isn’t that why we write? We are moved and convinced that we have to express what we feel. Yet, we can’t explain what we feel to others so we write. We write in journals, online, we draw, we paint and create poetry, limericks, prose and stories. We write memoirs and essays. Jot down technical description and codexes. We create new literature every single second. Our thoughts beg to be put down on paper lest they scamper away.

Yet, a lot of what I want to write about I can’t write about. I have to think about my professional life. Oh, how I would love to write about how difficult my job can be at times. I’d love to deface the idealistic views people have of humanity. I’d love to create volumes of work about how horrible my life is.

I’m in that kind of mood. I’m trying to grasp straws; to keep hope alive when I feel like I have to give up.

I’ve been so busy that I haven’t been able to write much; I’m so tired that writing seems like a chore I can’t possibly surmount. Becoming financially stable seems like an impossible task. I’m quite certain I’ll keep making the same mistakes.

I was jazzed up about writing for NaNoWriMo. I want to write but I feel as though there aren’t enough hours in the day for me to write, own horses, work 40+ hours a week and live life. Writing is super important to me. I want to write. I dream of writing and networking and I want so much more.

The basis for most of my problems is that I want too much. I want to write too much. I want to explain too much. My characters are locked up by their need to want but not knowing if they deserve what they want. It is Lila’s week. I have to write her story and I’m not certain what to write. She is so close to my heart.

Other Reviews:

This fall I love:

Manhattan Love Story- The main antagonist is quirky, funny and bookish. I love how she over thinks things and her demeanor. I didn’t want to watch it at first but now I’m hooked.

Selfie: The main character is self absorbed but I relate to her because she wants to be liked. Our generation definitely has to deal with the fact we really don’t know what we are doing.

Once Upon A Time: This is a standard for me. I have to watch it on Sunday night. If I don’t bad things will happen. I love the characters and the stories. However, I want to meet Jasmine and The Frog Princess. I think those characters would be great to add into the mix.

A to Z: This is on NBC it’s interesting. Again a silly comedy about falling in love.

This Fall’s theme:

New Love and New Relationships- the eager excitement of opportunity and the uncertainty of whether or not it will happen.

Duchess of the Dark: Part Two

Here in the Northeast it is raining dogs and cats (well, not literally) but it is a day I wish I could curl up in comfy sweats and read a book or two. Alas, I have to be at work by noon. I did, however, finish the next installment of the serial I’m working on. Check it out here it’s a bit longer but since this serial is a work in progress it isn’t perfect.

That is what I want my readers to understand- the serial is a complicated first draft of sorts. You see, I’ve reworked the book multiple times. I’ve had to add and subtract characters, plot lines and story elements. This book has been maddening and confusing. The more I push to get done with this infernal book the more it dallies and dottles. Writing a weekly serial helps me stay on track. My readers, because you expect another story I write it. I write for you. I already know what happens at the end. I don’t need to write the story but I write it for you.

The price for this serial is “Reader sets the price” which means you can price it for 0.00 or you can contribute towards my writing career. If you want to help in another way please write a review for any (or all) of my serials. Why? because it helps bring readers to my book but it also helps me know what my readers want.